Not all vulnerability is good vulnerability


As both an artist and an openly transgender person, vulnerability is a big part of my everyday life. Living in a vulnerable way has a lot of drawbacks. So I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about whether the value really justifies the cost.  It’s too late for me to slink back into the closet, but I sure could be less vocal and expressive. Everything I share is an opportunity to receive criticism...

The Bible on being trans & misuse of power


Since I came out as agender, I haven’t talked much about my faith. It’s not because I’m ashamed that I’m going against my beliefs, which some assume. I am living in deep alignment with my beliefs. It’s because, in most contexts in which faith has come up, it’s essentially cisgender people demanding that I defend my existence (“lifestyle choices” as they might put it) against their impenetrable...

My enemies (and how to tell if you’re one of them)


I was raised conservative evangelical. I could say many things about that aspect of my upbringing—one being that I memorized a sizable chunk of the Bible as a kid.  Of the thousands of words I memorized, there was one three-word phrase from a line Jesus said that I was often stewing on: “love your enemies.” Whenever the adults would discuss that line, it was always accompanied by talk of how...

Is it belief, or is it conformity?


It’s one thing to have a system of beliefs you live by. It’s another thing to live among people who accept you only on the condition that you believe what everyone’s supposed to believe. So many people live in that kind of social environment. For a long time, I was one of them. In those environments, “what you believe” stops being about creating a deep internal alignment of ideas, and simply...

Keep your questions inside the church


I woke up this morning with the following memory in my head. I was 21 years old. And I’d posted a question to Facebook: What do you think: should women be allowed to teach men? Or should they just be allowed to teach kids and other women? I posted it because it was taught in my church that women were under the authority of men. This meant (among other things) that women couldn’t teach men or...

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