DECONFORMING
Just a genderless person trying to be myself in a gendered society
Recent articles
Offensive terms to trans people: an ally’s guide
Our words have power to create and perpetuate ways of perceiving the world, whether for good or for bad. Transgender folks deal with a lot of complex forms of discrimination, and the language we use can play a big role in either lessening that or promoting it. Today,...
The meaning of transmasculine and transfeminine
There are two words deeply entwined with the concepts of masculinity and femininity that different transgender folks often use to describe themselves. Transmasculine means that someone is transgender in the direction of masculinity, but not that they are necessarily...
Are you transgender? If you are, it’s OK
More and more people are coming out as transgender these days. Transgender is a word that means that who you are doesn't line up with the gender that was assigned to you. It's pretty common to hear cisgender folks (especially if they're older or conservative) calling...
What’s it like to go through a gender transition?
Whether or not you're transgender, there's a good chance you can relate to aspects of a gender transition. A gender transition isn't necessarily a physical thing, though sometimes it does involve change to a person's physical body. It's an experience of shifting your...
Transphobic booby-traps in “pro-trans” media
There are many things about the trans experience that most cisgender people don’t understand. This means they often they accidentally or indirectly hurt trans people, even when they mean well. I don't take this personally. This is just where we’re at as a society....
How to use they/them pronouns (and why they matter)
Personal pronouns are the parts of speech we use when we talk about someone in third person. Like in the sentence below: She's going camping with John, even though he’s bringing his brother with him. Personal pronouns aren’t a thing most cisgender people think much...
What does TERF stand for?
TERF is an acronym that stands for Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminist. The acronym is used as a noun, pronounced like "turf." While that acronym might make it sound like it describes a technical and complex thing, it's actually pretty simple. TERFs are characterized...
This is not a woman’s body.
I've been experiencing gender dysphoria for all of my waking life since puberty (and for a lot of the time before that). It took me a long time to own up to that. The more that I do, the more I’m able to really understand how strange and disturbing it’s been to have...
Transphobia 101: how to not be transphobic
Many people have been working hard to change our society so that transgender people have more basic human rights. There's still a lot of work to be done, but we've been fighting for a better world—and things are changing. It's tough going, but stuff is happening. Part...
What I’m doing and how you can help
I started this website about six months ago because I recognized a serious problem, and I realized that I had the skills to start doing something about it. I'm now at a point where I need help to get the work I've been doing to gain some traction. So I'm reaching out...